Tip #9: Get Over Yourself… Everyone Else Has
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People who desire to fail forward must turn their attention away from themselves and toward helping others. Any ordinary person can make a positive impact on the lives of others.
Many people who struggle with chronic failure do so because they think of no one but themselves. They worry about what other people think of them. If you continually focus all your energy and attention on yourself, then it’s time to get over yourself. Everyone else has.
If you have a history of repeat failure and you dedicate most of your time and energy looking out for number one, you may need to learn a new way of thinking…where others come first.
Stop Focusing On Yourself
A major cause of negative thinking and poor mental health is self-absorption.Selfishness hurts not only the people around a self-focused person, but also the selfish person himself. It inclines the person toward failure because it keeps him in a negative mental rut.
Most people are too insecure to give anything away. Most people who focus all their attention on themselves feel that they’re missing something in their lives, so they’re trying to get it back.
Stop Taking Yourself Too Seriously
People in general have too much doom and gloom in their attitudes. They need to lighten up. No matter how serious your work is, that’s no reason to take yourself seriously. Laughter is the shortest distance between two people.
Start Putting The Team First
When competition is fierce, selfishness makes it almost impossible for a team to win. It ultimately produces failure. If you want to win and overcome failure, you’ve got to get over yourself.
Start Adding Value To Others Continually
When people think about you, do they say to themselves, “My life is better because of that person,” or “My life is worse?” Their response probably answers the question of whether you are adding value to them.
To succeed personally, you must try to help others. You get everything in life you want if you help enough other people get what they want. You can do this by…
Putting Others First in Your Thinking – To add values of others, you need to start putting others ahead of yourself in your mind and heart. If you can do it there, you will be able to put them first in your actions.
Finding Out What Others Need – Listen to people. Ask them what matters to them. When you know people’s values, you can add value to them.
Meeting That Need With Excellence And Generosity – Once you know what matters to people, do your best to meet their needs with excellence and generosity. With no thought toward what you might receive in return.
What matters is that you give all you can to the people who are important to you. And you can do that only if you learn to get over yourself. Be more concerned with what you can give rather than what you can get because giving truly is the highest level of living.
YOUR NINTH STEP:
Ask yourself the following questions daily:
- Who am I pouring my life into?
- Who am I helping who cannot help me in return?
- Who am I lifting who can’t help themselves?
- Who am I encouraging daily?
If you will act with the interest of others in mind every day, you will soon be able to give concrete, affirming answers to these questions.
Reply below to share your experiences. What did you discover about yourself after reading this tip? Was it difficult for you to do? Are you implementing asking yourself the four questions daily ? What do you think about these suggestions? Let us know! =)
Today’s Success Tip…
Don’t get stuck inside your own ego, because it will become a prison in no time flat. -Barbara Ward
With you on your journey…
NOTE: This is the 9th Mindset Tip in the series of a chapter by chapter summary of the book, “Failing Forward: Turning Mistakes into Stepping Stones for Success” by John C. Maxwell.