Tip #3: If You’ve Failed, Are You a Failure?

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It’s nearly impossible for any person to believe they are a failure and fail forward at the same time. Keeping a good perspective of yourself is important to overcoming adversity and making mistakes. What you have to tell yourself is “I’m not a failure. I failed at doing something.” There’s a big difference.

Every successful person is someone who failed, yet never regarded himself as a failure. Vincent van Gogh sold only one painting in his lifetime. Thomas Edison was considered unteachable as a youngster. And, Albert Einstein was told by a schoolmaster that he would “never amount to much.” In the face of adversity,
rejection and failings, they continue believing in themselves and refuse to consider themselves failures.

Building peoples’ egos breeds negative traits. When you praise someone, base it on the truth. Don’t make up nice things to say about others. Value people, praise their efforts and then reward their performance. Use that method with everyone, even yourself. Don’t give yourself a reward until after the job is finished. When you approach a task, give it your very best and no matter what the results are, you’ll have a clear conscience.

The 7 Abilities Needed to Fail Forward

1. Achievers Reject Rejection
A person is literally what they think, their character being the complete sum of all their thoughts. Make sure your thinking is on the right track. People who don’t give up keep trying because they don’t base their self-worth on their performance. Rather than say “I’m a failure,” they say “I missed that one.”

2. Achievers See Failure As Temporary
People who personalize failure see a problem as a hole they are permanently stuck in. Achievers see any predicament as temporary.

3. Achievers See Failures As Isolated Incidents
When achievers fail, they see it as a momentary event, not a lifelong epidemic. It’s not personal. If you want to succeed, don’t let any single incident color your view of yourself.

4. Achievers Keep Expectations Realistic
If you want to take a stroll in your neighborhood, you can reasonably expect to have few, if any, problems. But that’s not the case if you intend to climb Mount Everest. It takes time, effort, and the ability to overcome setbacks. You have to approach each day with reasonable expectations.

5. Achievers Focus on Strengths
What distinguishes winners from losers is that winners concentrate at all times on what they can do, not what they can’t do. The idea is to remember your successes. The best bet for failing forward is developing and maximizing your strengths.

6. Achievers Vary Approaches to Achievement
In “The Psychology of Achievement”, Brian Tracy writes about 4 millionaires who made their fortunes by age 35. They were involved in an average of 17 businesses before finding the one that took them to the top. They kept trying and changing until they found something that worked for them.

7. Achievers Bounce Back
Life is a series of outcomes. Sometimes the outcome is what you want. Great. Figure out what you did right. Sometimes the outcome is what you don’t want. Great. Figure out what you did so you won’t do it again.

YOUR THIRD STEP:
Remove the YOU from Failure…

Break yourself out of that negative thinking pattern. Look at an area in your life where
you have repeatedly failed and do the following:
1. Examine your expectations for that area and write them down.
2. Find at least 20 new approaches and then try at least half of them.
3. Focus on Your strengths.
4. Vow to bounce back, no matter how many times you fall down.

Reply below to share your experiences. How did you feel when you removed the YOU from failure by applying one of the four methods suggested? What do you think about this method? Let us know! =)

Today’s Success Tip…
Failure isn’t so bad if it doesn’t attack the heart. Success is all right if it doesn’t go to the head. -Grantland Rice

With you on your journey…

NOTE: This is the 3rd Mindset Tip in the series of a chapter by chapter summary of the book, “Failing Forward: Turning Mistakes into Stepping Stones for Success” by John C. Maxwell.